So what’s a guy to do? Fear not, having previously been a professional celebrity male groomer for over a decade, , I’m here to share some of my top tips on how to really wow that lucky lady on the all-important first date.

1. Always wear a VGJ (Very Good Jacket). It can change everything, and it will be the first thing your date notices as you walk through the door. Anything from a great leather jacket, to a double-breasted coat. If you aren’t a fashion forward guy, you can’t go wrong with a decent denim or bomber jacket. But if you are more savvy in the styling department, find yourself a well fitted coat like this one from Zara Men’s and you’ll upgrade your outfit instantly.
2. Accesorise with caution – wear a nice watch! Less is more in this department, but keeping it simple with a couple of understated simplistic rings, or a nice watch, and your outfit will really come together. The watch doesn’t have to be flash. Go with what suits your style.
3. Keep it smart casual – Keep your colours neutral or monochrome. Ultimately you want your outfit to be reasonably safe, no garish or bilious motifs or logos. I’m a huge advocate for a crisp white shirt, teamed with well-fitted chinos or jeans and of course a great pair of shoes!  This Reiss shirt is the perfect example for your go-to white shirt.  For something extra, add a sweater, or a bomber jacket, adjusting the colour palette accordingly. Light tones for day dates and dark shades for night dates.
4. No matter how casual the date, pay attention to your shoes – Doesn’t matter whether you are wearing your best new white converse for your trip round Hyde Park or your best new loafers for dinner at Nobu, you can bet she will look to see what you are wearing on your feet. Shoes say a lot about you as a person and are a window into your personality and style. Ensure your footwear is clean, functional and stylish.
5. Book in a trip to the barbers – Either a week or a few days before the all-important date. Now is not the time to experiment with the latest on-trend trim. Stick to what you know suits and compliments your face shape.
6. A little spritz of cologne goes a long way – do not go over kill! Smelling good is just as important as dressing right but we’re aiming for a subtle impact here, not to overpower the room. A spritz of your favourite scent inside your shirt and on your neck is more than enough.
7. Quarter zip & jeans – Quarter zip sweaters are excellent for layering and always look nice. Combine a quarter zip with jeans and Chelsea boots, and you’ve got a fantastic outfit that you can wear nearly year-round.

At the end of the day, the same rules apply as any other day when it comes to getting dressed for a first date; where you’re going and what the weather is like should determine what you wear. Whilst your outfit will change based on the location and weather, having a few core pieces will make picking out a killer first-date outfit much easier.

By Frances B Shillito

The post What outfits to wear on a first date – men’s edition appeared first on Project 143.

Tips for Dating During COVID

Get Creative With Dates – Though lockdown restrictions and social distancing measures are slowly easing, it could be a while before everything is back to normal. Thankfully, that doesn’t need to put a stop to dating altogether. By getting creative with your date activities, you can enjoy meeting new people and potentially meet your perfect match during COVID. If you are not able to sit inside a busy restaurant, head to the park for a romantic picnic. If you want to avoid large crowds, book a table outside a quiet bar for drinks in the city. If you’re not able to attend a concert or theatre performance, take a look for an outdoor event. Though COVID may limit your date plans somewhat, it doesn’t rule them out completely and there are plenty of COVID friendly options.

Be Selective – At Project 143, we place a lot of emphasis on handpicking people to match you with and this is even more important amidst COVID. With many of us wanting to mingle with fewer people, carefully selecting who you date and where you go is paramount. Rather than going on a date because an algorithm says you should, we choose your matches based on you as an individual and what you are looking for. Of course, this doesn’t mean being too picky and not giving people a chance. Rather than wasting your time and energy on someone who you know isn’t right for you, you can focus your attention on those with genuine potential.

Give Remote Dating a Go – If you have been looking to date during COVID, you will know that meeting remotely is hugely popular. With the pandemic going on, many singletons turned to remote dating and this isn’t something that will go away when lockdown ends. Though there are downsides of conducting a date via Skype, FaceTime or Zoom – it’s hard to look your best when your camera freezes and we all know the struggles of an audio delay – it’s a good way to find out if you get on. If you have a lot to talk about and the conversation flows, think about going out on a ‘real’ date when you are able to. If there is no spark and awkward silences aplenty, you won’t have wasted an evening finding out.

Get Back Out There

Like many people, you may have let dating take a back seat during COVID and rightly so. Simply, there were more important things to worry about. However, now is the time to get back out there and dust off those dating outfits. With the world opening up again, there has never been a better time to give dating your all. With Project 143, help is at hand and you won’t be doing it alone.

With lockdown – slowly, but surely – coming to an end, you can afford to make dating a priority again. That doesn’t mean you have to throw yourself back in at the deep end and download a tonne of dating apps, but putting some feelers out there and showing willingness to meet your match can make a huge difference. Though dating during COVID may be daunting and a little out of your ‘new normal’ comfort zone, it’s certainly worth it in the end.

The post Dating During COVID appeared first on Project 143.

As we get older and we begin dating, we start to question this reality. When we find ourselves single in our thirties or older, or recovering from a breakup, and the idea of the perfect someone is quickly called into question. After all, if they really were perfect for us, wouldn’t they have found us already? Well, no, not exactly.

What Makes Someone Perfect For Us?

There is no denying that there are people we are better suited to than others, you only need to go on one bad date to know that. However, that doesn’t mean that we all need to be looking for the same perfect someone. Instead of looking for the perfect person, we need to look for the perfect someone for us. This doesn’t mean someone who ticks every box and does no wrong, it means someone who shares similar goals and desires; someone we can build a life and grow with, someone we want to spend time with, someone we can share our thoughts and feelings with.

A lot of people focus on finding their ideal match in terms of what they look like, the job they have and what they have achieved in life. If you’re especially picky, you may factor where they are from or their financial standing in as well. Instead, you should be focusing on finding someone whose personality compliments yours and who wants similar things out of life.

Think about it, it’s much more important to find someone who shares your views on having children than it is to find someone who has the same favourite movie as you. It’s much more important to find someone who has similar interests to you, than it is to find someone who graduated with a specific degree from a specific university. You may have an idea of who the perfect someone is, but you can’t rule anyone out.

Should We Be Compromising on Perfection?

Too many people go into the world of dating with a clear idea of what they want and though it’s good to know what you are looking for in a partner, you need to be prepared to compromise. This doesn’t mean settling for less than you deserve, it means being open to the idea that the perfect someone may not be who you were expecting.

They can be perfect for you in the way they make you feel, the joy they bring you and the life goals they share. They may not share your love of going to the theatre or eating specific cuisine, but does that mean they’re not your perfect someone? No, as long as they embrace your likes and you embrace theirs. Many experts would agree that a little imperfection is key to a healthy relationship.

Being someone’s perfect someone is much more than being perfect on paper, it’s all about chemistry and making the relationship work in the long run. Relationships do require a certain level of compromise from both parties, but this shouldn’t take away from you feeling as though someone is perfect for you. You can compromise and ask someone to compromise, whilst still being a perfect match. A lot of people spend their time dating searching for someone who is just like them, only to realise the perfect someone is the exact opposite.

They say opposites attract and there is some truth to it, so be open to this possibility when you are looking for your perfect someone.

[Asian Matchmaking, Asian Dating, No Algorithms No Games]

The post Is There a Perfect Someone? appeared first on Project 143.

Perhaps you are you still looking for “the one”? Well, don’t worry, because I understand how meeting a partner is not always easy. That’s precisely why I’m here to help!

Now I know these cold, dark and wintery nights aren’t very motivating, are they? Sometimes you don’t want to go out, do you?

STOP right there! You can’t think like that!

If you want to find, make, and keep a loving and long-lasting relationship, you have to make some changes. This being so, if you find yourself going nowhere fast, here are my top 20 dating resolutions for the New Year:-

20 dating resolutions for 2017:-

1. Try creating more adventurous and different dates—think beyond just drinks!
2. Don’t waste time hanging out with someone you’re not interested in just because you don’t want to be alone.
3. Say no, if you’re not interested or attracted.
4. Forget your type. Like the clean-shaven man? Instead try a bearded man!
5. Same goes for guys – avoid having ‘types’. Change your preference for long, straight hair and instead try short and curly!
6. End that on-again, off-again relationship. Please don’t waste your time.
7. Do what feels right. If you feel like calling your date the day after you first meet, do so!
8. Make time for dating. Everyone is very busy, but when you meet someone who could potentially be a great match, make time for them.
9. Speak up. If you want to define the relationship, tell your partner you want to take it to the next level. But not when you’re drunk!
10. Be realistic. Don’t create a fantasy where you imagine your honeymoon before you’ve gone on the first date.
11. Be proactive. You’re never going to meet anyone if you’re sitting at home in your pyjamas keeping up with the Kardashians.
12. Leave the bad dates in 2016. Don’t even think about drunk texting them when you’re lonely, bored, or depressed. Stop revisiting the past.
13. Know what you want in a partner once and for all.
14. Don’t settle. You wouldn’t settle for a job that you absolutely didn’t love, so don’t settle for a partner. Imagine how you would feel to learn if your date felt they were settling to be with you. Awful!
15. Stop wasting time over-analysing text messages with friends. No matter how much you discuss it, you may never know what that winky face meant.
16. If they’re not contacting you, let it go. When someone wants to see you, they will reach out.
17. On your first date, be positive and upbeat. Smile a lot. Laugh. Be the person you would like to date.
18. To find a serious partner, date with purpose. Look for dates who you want to share your life with, rather a casual fling.
19. Make the first move. Life is too short!
20. Finally, don’t think there is something wrong with you because you’re still single. There’s nothing wrong with being single!

In conclusion, I wish you a healthy, happy year ahead.

Bottom line, you can find love in 2017 if you help to make it happen.

The post Dating Resolutions for 2017 appeared first on Project 143.

Some reports suggest a six month milestone. Other reports say it’s when couples meet the parents.

But what happens when you pass the six month period? What if you haven’t said or heard those words yet? Should you worry?

No! Absolutely not!

As an asian dating professional, I say, there are NO rules!

Here are 5 things I recommend you to remember about those famous words:-

1. Say “I love you” when you mean it

First of all, you shouldn’t say “I love you” unless you mean it.

And if you mean it, then you should say it – a LOT!

2. Timing ISN’T Important…

Whilst some people stress the importance of timing, for example, ‘go on at least ‘x’ many dates’, or ‘never say it first’, is timing really more important than honesty and self-disclosure?

However, in my professional opinion, there is no precise formula for when to say “I love you.”

As such, you should say it whenever you feel that way, without making calculations about timing.

Thus when love at first sight happens, you SHOULD say “I love you”. You are just expressing how you feel at the moment. There is nothing wrong with that. Because disclosing your emotions is honest, and honesty is great!

3. … But Time IS!

On the other hand, time is key in your relationship, not timing.

What do I mean?

In short, time will impact significantly upon its duration, frequency, and development. Time may also increase trust and honesty between partners. In short, true, meaningful love needs time to develop.

As I explained in Rule 2, whilst it’s normal to say “I love you” after a short time, if it feels right, it isn’t a good idea to say “I love you” after a fleeting moment.

This could imply that you are not really serious about what is in fact a serious matter. You may say that you see great potential for the relationship to grow. Remember, we can recognise potential. We cannot recognise or guarantee its inevitable implementation.

Bottom line, love over time enhances trust and honesty between partners.

4. Should you respond?

My clients ask me if and how, and if, they should respond to “I love you”.

First of all, you don’t have to tell someone that you love them just because they have told you how they feel.

Unless you are 100% sure of your feelings,  say that although right now you do not know whether you love them, you do know that you like them a lot.

Explain that you want to get to know them better, and that you want to give the relationship a chance to grow. This is genuine and heartfelt.

It does not matter who says “I love you” first, or who says it more frequently.

Remember, what really counts is the sincerity and depth of your relationship and how it develops.

5. Actions speak louder than words

Finally, the words “I love you” can also be demonstrated in actions, as well as words.

Couples often express love through everyday actions. This includes things like the receipt and acknowledgment of your partner’s acts of love, their gestures of kindness, generosity and attention.

Hence if you ever start to worry that you haven’t heard “I love you” recently from your partner, take note if they’re showing their love in any of those amazing day-to-day actions.

The post When should you say “I love you” appeared first on Project 143.

It’s Halloween soon, and as a matchmaking professional it got me thinking about the one really ‘scary’ thing people fear more than witches and ghosts. Starting a new relationship! Why? Because it’s something unknown – and we are scared of that.

Let’s face it, falling in love means taking a risk. We place a lot of trust in the other person. We let their response to our emotions affect us. We feel exposed and vulnerable.

Some people think that the the more we care, the more we can get hurt. As a consequence and as an Asian dating expert, I advise Indian singles who are looking for a serious date or partner, “when you free yourself from the fear, you will attract lasting love.”

Here are 5 steps to STOP being afraid of falling in love:-

1. All relationships don’t fail, just like all relationships won’t always work.

Relationships don’t always fail, just like all relationships won’t always work. A past relationship may have failed because it just wasn’t the right relationship.

Thus, we can learn from a bad relationship experience so our present life isn’t hurt by the past. This being so, get rid of the false belief to eradicate the false terror of falling in love.

2. Meet MORE people

Remember to proactively get out and meet people! As a result, your thought process will change – for the better! In addition, don’t call people for a date after you meet them for the first time. Instead, just keep meeting new people. Certainly, you can invite right one for a date when it just feels right.

Your fears won’t disappear overnight, but, as a result you will certainly be able to get rid of it in time. Hence follow my recommended steps to get the results you want!

3. What are you really afraid of?

If you are frightened of love, it’s important to look at your trepidations and to try to understand them. Are you afraid of letting love in because you don’t trust people? Are you scared of letting love in because you don’t love yourself? Or perhaps because you don’t know if you could really love someone else? There are many reasons you might be holding back.

Consequently, it’s important to look at the reasons behind your qualms. So if you have issues with trust or self-love it’s important try to understand yourself better. As a result, it will probably be easier for you to let love in.

4. Your fear will not stop you from experiencing pain

Because living in fear is already living in pain! So instead of avoiding alleged sources of pain, you need to seek sources of happiness.

By so doing you will see the joy of falling in love. In addition, you will also to see life in a new way. You will meet people who share your values and who appreciate you.

5. The right person will calm you

If your heart has been broken, falling in love can be motifying. You think about your previous experiences almost all of the time. That’s normal. But it’s not that scary if you have someone by your side that you trust. The right person will understand and support you.

In addition, ask whether it’s your irrational “fear” that is holding you back back from a good relationship. Or is your confusion a sign that the relationship isn’t good for you? Think about this, and listen to your gut.

To conclude, if you sense you have found a good match that might turn into something amazing, be brave and go for it! Most of all, please go and find love  – and fall in love –  this Halloween!

The post Scared of ghosts this Halloween? Or are you scared of falling in love? appeared first on Project 143.